My Christmas blog is a little late this year. I had planned on getting it out Christmas week but my family came down with the flu. Dad, of course got his flu shot but neglected to get the family vaccinated. Oh well, there is always next year…
Then my youngest daughter came down with vomiting and severe right lower quadrant abdominal pain. Off we went to the hospital with the expectation of her having surgery for appendicitis and us spending Christmas in the hospital. Well, a little miracle happened and she had a remarkable turnaround and came home without needing surgery.
What does this have to do with anything? Well, I have been thinking a lot about hope lately. This season is about hope. I have come to realize that to a large extent what I do is to deal in hope. The hope of having a family.
My daughter that was in the hospital had the opportunity this Fall to play the lead in the musical, “A Secret Garden”. There is a scene in the play where her character has lost hope and her housekeeper is trying to give her encouragement.
My favorite lines are:
What you’ve got to do is
Finish what you have begun,
I don’t know just how,
But it’s not over ’til you’ve won!When you see the storm is coming,
See the lightning part the skies,
It’s too late to run-
There’s terror in your eyes!
What you do then is remember
This old thing you heard me say:
“It’s the storm, not you,
That’s bound to blow away.”
The phrase, “Finish what you have begun” and “it’s not over ‘til you’ve won!” have particular meaning to the couple struggling with infertility.
I also love the verse:
Hold on,
Hold on, the night will soon be by.
Hold on,
Until there’s nothing left to try.”
When I watched the opening show this year, I was feeling particularly down, but when I heard this verse I thought it said, “Hold on, and think of something else to try.” I was struck by this. It seemed to me, the essence of what hope is, is found in this phrase and the first phrase:
- It’s the storm, not you, that’s bound to blow away.
- Hold on, and think of something else to try.
When your journey becomes darkened by the storms of life, whether by infertility of something else, the first thing we need to do is hold on and let the worst of the storm blow by. It always does. Another Broadway musical song comes to mind, “The Sun ‘il come out tomorrow”.
Next, we need to fix our mind to a new solution. A new path to a brighter future. We can’t just dwell on the storm. We need to formulate a plan to clearer skies. We need to think of something else to try. When it comes to infertility, that is my job. I need to sit with you and help you find something else to try. Fixing your mind to that then gives you the hope to go on.
One of the great blessings of my life has been to work with patients who have already understood these two principles. When the storms of life have beat upon them they just pull out a strong emotional umbrella and come into my office and say, “Ok Dr. Moffitt, what’s next”.
I hope that during this festive time of the year you are all blessed with clear skies, and if not, that the hope of the season will guide you a new bright path of hope along your journey.