A husband and father’s heart wrenching struggle

I first met Joseph and his wife in 2012. At that time, they had experienced infertility for 8 years and had already done 3 cycles of IVF without success. Some people you just like the first time you meet them. They have so much energy – they give you energy. Over the next 12 years I would watch him, and his wife navigate a heart wrenching struggle to have a baby.

A 20 year fertility journey

The journey took them from using her eggs to using the eggs of a family member to using the eggs of several donors to using a gestational carrier with initial success and then a tragic loss and finally a second gestational carrier.

Each time they experienced an obstacle or failure he would comfort his wife, suppress his own grief and look for solutions and the next step. This happened over and over again, and I could see in his eyes the toll it took. Near the end I could see how tired he was. How the next step just seemed too hard to take. Nevertheless, he would pick himself up and somehow put one foot in front of the other.

Similarities to Joseph’s journey

This Christmas his story reminds me of another Joseph long ago. He did not pick the journey he had to take with his wife. It was a long journey through hilly terrain making travel arduous and time consuming. He was just trying to do his best to take care of his wife. He knocked on many doors only to be met with rejection and failure.

His story is similar to my friend’s, a story of persistence, resilience, making the best of a difficult situation, love for his wife, and expecting a miracle.

And like with my friend, the miracle is a baby.

Merry Christmas!

A Nativity Story